I really didn't expect this to happen to me.
When I received the letter this morning, it was as though I'm receiving a letter from Hogwarts.
I made it to smtp :D
I totally didn't expect it, because firstly I'm not aware of this direct admission route, or I thought it will be for the really selected few. Given that I didn't do very well for my EOY, I didn't think that I will be considered at all.
Maybe my teachers helped me, I really don't know. Teachers, if you helped me, I really really thank you ^^ Of course I must also thank all my teachers, from sec 1 till now, who have nurtured me to be the person I am today.
I'm not letting go of this opportunity. But taking smtp means that the contrasting subject is limited to econ, KI or geog.
I really want to take KI, but after seeing the course requirement I start to feel less confident, worrying about whether my current standard of the English language will put me into a large disadvantage, and whether I will like what we will learn in KI in the first place.
Also, I see in some of the blogs and comments that KI requires active exchange of ideas in the class, which is not suitable for quiet people like me.
If I truly like what we will be studying, I believe these are not problems. But the problem is the uncertainty.
And seeing the content for human geog, I feel like hanging on a rope. Human geog is IH all over again, which is just...sigh. No.
Econ? No way.
Gah why are there so little choice of contrasting subjects. What shall I choose?
Leaving that aside, I'm greatly looking forward to JC life. Okay I know it will be tough, but I think it will be interesting. We get to learn a lot new things and the curriculum is more flexible too (but more deadly). I will be also able to join an awesome CCA. Most importantly, I can finally find, hopefully, people who will not leave me that look and slowly walk away when I start to talk about all those wonderful theories...
Seeing how some people are already competitive in NY and how the JC environment is worse, here is a note to my future self to ensure that I will not be caught up in this mad rat race and lost my way:
Trust yourself, trust you heart. If you think you will love something, go ahead and try it. Let your passion leads you, it will never be wrong. Never try to compete against others, not only will you have a lowered self morale, this comparison will never end. Instead, look up to people and learn from them. If there is something which you don't understand, ask. You can be shy about anything but clarification. Meeting strangers may be intimidating, but note that they will be your classmates and teacher for two years. Just act spontaneous and be your weird self, instead of being tensed up and losing you unique identity. Be kind, but don't be conventional. People will appreciate your personality someday.
Stay humble. It is likely that you will see guys there boasting much and looking very intelligent. Don't feel depressed. It is normal. Instead of feeling bad about yourself, why not learn from them, internalise it and strive to reach the same height? This is not competition but a motivation. Any improvement is something worth happy for.
Also, don't be too caught up in the disease known as mugging. Try not to mug for exams but study and learn in the process. Revision is revision, not studying all over again. To avoid the pain of mugging, eradicate all your question marks along the studying process. Doing homework is less important than understanding. If you feel your understanding is not quite there, ask, practice, and learn from mistakes.
Remember, A level is not the end, although teachers insist it is. You have a long life after A level. Just as how you may not waste 6 years preparing for PSLE and 4 years preparing for O levels (no O levels for us though), you should not base your life on exams. No, that is just so sad. There are much more in life, much much more, though you probably shouldn't waste time on computer games and facebook anymore.
So, enjoy JC life, don't get tensed up, manage your work well, sleep and eat when you need to. Don't fall sick, don't play comp games (quit minecraft, just do it), be friendly, act spontaneous (to avoid awkwardness), be adventurous and have fun.
Hopefully my future self can refer to this when I feel lost.
Wednesday 30 October 2013
Monday 28 October 2013
Background changes
So I've just changed the background of the blog to a much nicer, less clustered one. I love it because there are so many sheep,so many hexagons, it is blue, it has a child riding a sheep which is awesome.
Have I mentioned about my obsession with hexaflexagons anywhere in my blog? No? None at all? What a shame. Hexaflexagons are awesome. I get to know it through this vihart video:
And then started my streak of vihart hexaflexagon vidoes:
Have I mentioned about my obsession with hexaflexagons anywhere in my blog? No? None at all? What a shame. Hexaflexagons are awesome. I get to know it through this vihart video:
And then started my streak of vihart hexaflexagon vidoes:
Vihart's videos are really awesome. They made me wonder about a lot of things, and believe it or not, made me appreciate the beauty of mathematics.
I know I shouldn't abuse the word awesomeness, but these are simply...awesome. There are no better words to describe. Even words like cool and great are under-rating the level of awesomeness.
That obsession started during EOY revision period and probably distracted me a lot, but it's totally worth it. I made a lot of hexaflexagons since then.
And now, I'm obsessed with fractals. I shall just completely ignore the hardcore maths behind and focus on drawing my Koch snowflake and Sierpinski triangle on my hexaflexagons.
Friday 25 October 2013
INTP...I think
So previously I've been pondering whether I'm an INTP or an INTJ, and it caused me some headaches. Now, I think I can be certain...sort of, that I'm actually an INTP. Being INTP is equally, if not more awesome than INTJ, because INTPs act more spontaneously and can blend in better compared to INTJs. Well, as least there won't be a bunch of people in the world hating you. And INTPs are really nice people, who equally don't bother about people but don't make it obvious. Anyway, INTPs are awesome. There are many people who I admire are INTPs, and I feel really honoured to have the same personality type as them.
/random insertion/
Take Free Jungian Functions Test
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com
Moving on to the present. I've just got back all my results, I would say most of them are not very surprising, just my normal standard I guess, but IM2 is good, and physics is bad. Oh wait why am I talking about results here nobody will care about it anyway...but that goes the same for everything else in this blog. Anyway, the result is not the end. Nothing is the end but, maybe, death. I have my future laid in front of me, full of possibilities and opportunities. This EOY doesn't say anything, but during this period I suddenly have an increased interest in some things. I actually managed to see more clearly what I truly enjoy doing and possibly what I'm going to do in my future.
Firstly, despite not doing so well in physics this time, I'm still choosing it in JC. Not only because I feel not much interest in studying biology (I actually got quite decent grades for bio this time, same as my chem actually, and I'm like whaaat how is this acceptable), but I do like physics, especially modern physics. Not that interested in mechanics etc though, but to study modern physics I have to master classical physics first, just like how I've to put in efforts for LA in order to do KI. But I think going KI is hopeless now, since my LA still can't make it.
Anyway, I don't dislike bio. I just find all the memorising a painful process. I can only remember things that make sense. Memorising mere figures and specific names is really not to my liking. In contrast, physics makes sense of things, which is precisely what I love. It is the most fundamental science and requires the most academic rigour. Though I'm probably not going to be a physicist in the future, learning the concepts is a joy.
So what will I become in the future? To be honest, I don't know, but certainly related to the physical sciences. I think chemistry may be more suitable for me, and oh I love chemistree. I've checked out a couple of forums online comparing chemistry and physics. The conclusions I got are:
#1. Physics is a lot, a lot of maths. Well, maths is the language of physics. Many commented that when you go to advance level, you have the first few lines originating from theories and the rest is all maths. I am okay with mathematics, but without theories maths mean little to me. In fact I think mathematics is a very very condensed form of theory represented by symbols, and because they are so condensed people cannot get some of the idea behind, but they don't need to since all we need is to be able to manipulate them. Too much maths make me dizzy. I admit I'm not the genius type of people so I don't think I have the brain. Honestly.
#2. All of the physicists now are devoted into that one theory--the string theory. String theory is an awesome theory, but it cannot be confirmed. We can't even understand quantum mechanics well enough, and now we are trying to delve into forming a theory of everything? I'm a bit sceptical about whether we as humble human beings will be able to contemplate the deepest mysteries of the universe. And when will we reach the end? Even if string theory is successful, that we are able to explain black holes, the big bang, parallel worlds and so on, we will then have to ask even more fundamental questions. We will have to question the principals underlying the explanations, and so on. It is just like how we question matter: First we know atoms make up matter, and sub-atomic particles make up atoms, and elementary particles make up sub-atomic particles, and strings make up these particles. So what make up these strings? Where is the 11th dimension? What happens before the before of beginning of big bang? You see, it never ends. Although I agree it is always good to delve deeper, string theory now is dangerously evolving into metaphysics, which is philosophy, which is reasonable because philosophy deals with things we can't be sure with because we have no way to test it--the same situation confronting string theory. Seeing how the trend goes, I don't think we can go on to solve the even more fundamental questions. We have reached our limits, as humans, as three/four dimensional beings. I may be wrong, but I feel that it's the case.
#3. And thus, chemistry is better for me, because it is definitely more practical, it requires less maths, and it is more concept oriented. Sometimes it is not easy to draw a line between physics and chemistry.
#4. I shall never be an engineer
Maybe talking about the future is too early for a pre-JC student. I will see how it goes.
And as an INTP I realised that I'm beginning to be interested in philosophy, but it kinds of bug me when there is no definite answer. However the process of thinking is enjoyable. I don't know much about this field yet, maybe I can read up on this. (This is reason I want to do KI in JC)
Lastly, as the doom of JC subject combination draws near, I'm starting to get anxious over the contrasting subject to choose. Just choose econ I heard you say, but I HATE ECONOMICS and I know for sure that choosing it will inflict two years of intense agony. Just no. If I can't go KI, I really don't know what to choose. Definitely not ELL or Eng lit or history. Maybe CSC or CLL? But I'm not inclined to literature, I know it is interesting but I'm the lit type of person, and CSC is IH all over again but in Chinese, which makes it better but the content will still be things I dislike. And if I choose other than geog/KI/econ I can't do SMTP or GATE :( Geog? Idk, but I've already lost out two years. And geog requires a lot of mugging. I hate to mug, and I don't like human geog. I guess I will make the choice after listening to some of the trial-lectures.
/random insertion/
Jungian Functions Test Results
|
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com
Moving on to the present. I've just got back all my results, I would say most of them are not very surprising, just my normal standard I guess, but IM2 is good, and physics is bad. Oh wait why am I talking about results here nobody will care about it anyway...but that goes the same for everything else in this blog. Anyway, the result is not the end. Nothing is the end but, maybe, death. I have my future laid in front of me, full of possibilities and opportunities. This EOY doesn't say anything, but during this period I suddenly have an increased interest in some things. I actually managed to see more clearly what I truly enjoy doing and possibly what I'm going to do in my future.
Firstly, despite not doing so well in physics this time, I'm still choosing it in JC. Not only because I feel not much interest in studying biology (I actually got quite decent grades for bio this time, same as my chem actually, and I'm like whaaat how is this acceptable), but I do like physics, especially modern physics. Not that interested in mechanics etc though, but to study modern physics I have to master classical physics first, just like how I've to put in efforts for LA in order to do KI. But I think going KI is hopeless now, since my LA still can't make it.
Anyway, I don't dislike bio. I just find all the memorising a painful process. I can only remember things that make sense. Memorising mere figures and specific names is really not to my liking. In contrast, physics makes sense of things, which is precisely what I love. It is the most fundamental science and requires the most academic rigour. Though I'm probably not going to be a physicist in the future, learning the concepts is a joy.
So what will I become in the future? To be honest, I don't know, but certainly related to the physical sciences. I think chemistry may be more suitable for me, and oh I love chemistree. I've checked out a couple of forums online comparing chemistry and physics. The conclusions I got are:
#1. Physics is a lot, a lot of maths. Well, maths is the language of physics. Many commented that when you go to advance level, you have the first few lines originating from theories and the rest is all maths. I am okay with mathematics, but without theories maths mean little to me. In fact I think mathematics is a very very condensed form of theory represented by symbols, and because they are so condensed people cannot get some of the idea behind, but they don't need to since all we need is to be able to manipulate them. Too much maths make me dizzy. I admit I'm not the genius type of people so I don't think I have the brain. Honestly.
#2. All of the physicists now are devoted into that one theory--the string theory. String theory is an awesome theory, but it cannot be confirmed. We can't even understand quantum mechanics well enough, and now we are trying to delve into forming a theory of everything? I'm a bit sceptical about whether we as humble human beings will be able to contemplate the deepest mysteries of the universe. And when will we reach the end? Even if string theory is successful, that we are able to explain black holes, the big bang, parallel worlds and so on, we will then have to ask even more fundamental questions. We will have to question the principals underlying the explanations, and so on. It is just like how we question matter: First we know atoms make up matter, and sub-atomic particles make up atoms, and elementary particles make up sub-atomic particles, and strings make up these particles. So what make up these strings? Where is the 11th dimension? What happens before the before of beginning of big bang? You see, it never ends. Although I agree it is always good to delve deeper, string theory now is dangerously evolving into metaphysics, which is philosophy, which is reasonable because philosophy deals with things we can't be sure with because we have no way to test it--the same situation confronting string theory. Seeing how the trend goes, I don't think we can go on to solve the even more fundamental questions. We have reached our limits, as humans, as three/four dimensional beings. I may be wrong, but I feel that it's the case.
#3. And thus, chemistry is better for me, because it is definitely more practical, it requires less maths, and it is more concept oriented. Sometimes it is not easy to draw a line between physics and chemistry.
#4. I shall never be an engineer
Maybe talking about the future is too early for a pre-JC student. I will see how it goes.
And as an INTP I realised that I'm beginning to be interested in philosophy, but it kinds of bug me when there is no definite answer. However the process of thinking is enjoyable. I don't know much about this field yet, maybe I can read up on this. (This is reason I want to do KI in JC)
Lastly, as the doom of JC subject combination draws near, I'm starting to get anxious over the contrasting subject to choose. Just choose econ I heard you say, but I HATE ECONOMICS and I know for sure that choosing it will inflict two years of intense agony. Just no. If I can't go KI, I really don't know what to choose. Definitely not ELL or Eng lit or history. Maybe CSC or CLL? But I'm not inclined to literature, I know it is interesting but I'm the lit type of person, and CSC is IH all over again but in Chinese, which makes it better but the content will still be things I dislike. And if I choose other than geog/KI/econ I can't do SMTP or GATE :( Geog? Idk, but I've already lost out two years. And geog requires a lot of mugging. I hate to mug, and I don't like human geog. I guess I will make the choice after listening to some of the trial-lectures.
Friday 18 October 2013
I want to live in a house...
I want to live in a house that is white, or colourful with red tiled roof. The house is enclosed in a garden like thing. There are nice, white woody fences around. Vines are tangling the fences, with some nice small purple flowers blossoming.
As we enter the house, the floor is made of some warm wood. In one corner of the house there is a fireplace. There must be a fireplace. The fire is dancing in its small hut, crackling as it consumes the logs. Near the fireplace is a oval carpet. The carpet has some pretty intriguing pattern. We have some comfortable chairs or sofa nearby, and maybe an old bookshelf on the wall with books. Lots and lots of books. The books look thick and old. The pages have started to turn yellow but crispy, and there is a pleasurable feeling when you turn them. The books are kept in place by very heavy, animal head shaped bookends.
I want the house to be permeated with music. Masterpieces by Mozart and Beethoven, no that will be too mainstream, maybe Vivaldi and Strauss, or Shostakovich, and loads of beautiful movie themes.
I want the walls to be lined with torches or oil lamps, but I guess that will be too unrealistic.
Not far from the fireplace is the dining corner, in which there is a long, rectangle table, made of some dark coloured wood. But the top of the table is covered by a brightly coloured tablecloth, like real cloth, it feels like wool. Then you have a vase in the middle of the table, and some nice crystal lights hanging on the ceiling. The entire place is lit by a very warm yellowish light, you know, not that kind of white and cold fluorescent ones.
I haven't really thought of the other rooms in the house yet. But I want to hang paintings all over the walls, okay not really all over, but there must be a lot of paintings hanging around, be it cartoon or surreal. I don't like modern paintings. I don't study art. I'll hang it if I think it looks nice.
Maybe in the ceiling of my bedroom I demand some lighting. It will be ideal if the ceiling is made of glass or open-able so that I can glance at the stars. Oh yeah the house must be in somewhere where I can see stars. If that is too unrealistic I should at least have some sort of dark ceiling with really little light bulbs in it looking like tiny specks of some luminous wonders. That will be awesome.
Ideally, the bedroom is all covered in some fluffy carpet so that I can continue rolling on the floor after I roll down my bed.
The bathroom must have a bathtub. I want a bathtub so badly!!!!! Then some parts of the floor be covered with sand and shells. It make me feels as though I'm swimming in some parts of the ocean. The bathroom walls are covered with tiles of different shades of blue, in random distribution, all the way till the ceiling. The ceiling is light blue, mimicking the sky.
Oh and maybe a yellow rubber duck in the bathtub. Yellow ducks are cool.
Somewhere in the basement of the house is my secret lab. Inside I'll have all sorts of weird things bubbling up awesomeness. Of course I'll ensure it's safe, with adequate fire extinguisher and stuff, so when something explodes it will not burn the entire house down. No, it's such a beautiful house, I won't allow that to happen. But yeah, I may store up some illegal chemicals and heavy metals...oh wait why I'm I posting it here. Silly me ignore this paragraph completely it exist only in my imagination. (But who knows maybe someday I'll be lucky enough...)
Anyway, back to other parts of the house. In my study room I'll have a very big waste paper bin, because I'm too lazy to empty the rubbish frequently. Like really big so I'll only have to clear it once every six months or sth. In my study room I want all the walls to be filled with books, books and more books! Muhahaha! It's like a mini library. I'll have a very big desk so I can put many things on it and none will be pushed down. Here the sound is very well insulated. Or maybe not, I can open my window and still hear the sound of nature. Maybe a twig grows into my room through a window and a bird build a nest on it and, I don't know. Oh and one of the books trigger a door hidden among the bookshelves to open, leading to...oh never mind.
Oh my I'm taking my fantasy too wild. But never mind, it's my dream, dreams can go beyond one's wildest imaginings.
So moving on, let's see we've talked about the living room, my bedroom, the bathroom, my study room, my secret... so what have we left with? Oh right the kitchen, I want the kitchen to look as bright and cheerful as possible. Every morning beams of light should shine in making everything look very happy. The curtains are orange and yellow, there are sunflowers on the table and all the cabinets should be yellow, orange or white, so the room looks like a playroom, but it's not. For the rest, I don't really know, cakes?
Oh and there are many glass jars containing delicious things or materials. I want the cookie jar to be extremely big and look cookie jar-ish. Because cookies are awesome.
What now? Hmm... okay let's move out of the house to the most important part...the garden. I must must have a garden and must must have a dog. It's a must, I don't care. (Btw I also must have the house to be two storeys or more so that I can slide down the handle of the staircase--sounds really fun but never got the chance to try it)
As I've mentioned, the garden must be enclosed by beautiful white fences. I don't really care what type of plants grow in my garden, I want nature to take its course. Maybe growing a few fruit trees, some bushes and the rest be lined with grass. I'll love it if some rabbits or squirrels can make my garden their home. And then like most people I'll put some gardening chairs in my garden, or maybe a coffee table so that I can drink tea in this wonderful setting. And to make my garden the secret garden I'm going to make the only entrance to it in a bookshelf. Nope not the one in my study room, that one links to my... this one
is in the living room, and you can just push one side of the shelf to get through, just like a revolving door.
I want my dog to be fluffy, medium to big size, looking friendly and bark at strangers but not for no reason. Sadly I've never gotten a chance to have a dog, but I swear that once I grow up I'm going to get a dog. Oh yeah and I created that garden partly so that my dog can fool around and play in it :)
I think I've really imagined too much, to the finest detail for some. Those who know me may be shocked by this. I'm always seen as someone logical, serious maybe (but really I'm not serious at all), but hey, as you see me thinking and being oblivious to the world you may think there's some important theories floating up in my mind, however in reality most of the time they are these kind of things. I've more than a gazillion times imagined how my future house will look like and came up with some amusing ideas. It feels good that I can share this. There are many many ways it can become and here is just one. It will take me forever to list all, and new ones will always pop into existence. (But do note that not all the time this happens...there are still times when important things come up in my head okay)
Why would you so randomly post this I hear you ask, well I happen to watch a night movie on channel 5, and as the ending music plays and I stayed curled up in my sofa I start to imagine myself curling up in the sofa near a fireplace, listening to the music. Then suddenly I felt very dreamy and happy, then I start to think of how my house could look like...and it begins.
Yeah I've always been like that, thinking of random things and then allowing it to bring me to random places. Now you know.
As we enter the house, the floor is made of some warm wood. In one corner of the house there is a fireplace. There must be a fireplace. The fire is dancing in its small hut, crackling as it consumes the logs. Near the fireplace is a oval carpet. The carpet has some pretty intriguing pattern. We have some comfortable chairs or sofa nearby, and maybe an old bookshelf on the wall with books. Lots and lots of books. The books look thick and old. The pages have started to turn yellow but crispy, and there is a pleasurable feeling when you turn them. The books are kept in place by very heavy, animal head shaped bookends.
I want the house to be permeated with music. Masterpieces by Mozart and Beethoven, no that will be too mainstream, maybe Vivaldi and Strauss, or Shostakovich, and loads of beautiful movie themes.
I want the walls to be lined with torches or oil lamps, but I guess that will be too unrealistic.
Not far from the fireplace is the dining corner, in which there is a long, rectangle table, made of some dark coloured wood. But the top of the table is covered by a brightly coloured tablecloth, like real cloth, it feels like wool. Then you have a vase in the middle of the table, and some nice crystal lights hanging on the ceiling. The entire place is lit by a very warm yellowish light, you know, not that kind of white and cold fluorescent ones.
I haven't really thought of the other rooms in the house yet. But I want to hang paintings all over the walls, okay not really all over, but there must be a lot of paintings hanging around, be it cartoon or surreal. I don't like modern paintings. I don't study art. I'll hang it if I think it looks nice.
Maybe in the ceiling of my bedroom I demand some lighting. It will be ideal if the ceiling is made of glass or open-able so that I can glance at the stars. Oh yeah the house must be in somewhere where I can see stars. If that is too unrealistic I should at least have some sort of dark ceiling with really little light bulbs in it looking like tiny specks of some luminous wonders. That will be awesome.
Ideally, the bedroom is all covered in some fluffy carpet so that I can continue rolling on the floor after I roll down my bed.
The bathroom must have a bathtub. I want a bathtub so badly!!!!! Then some parts of the floor be covered with sand and shells. It make me feels as though I'm swimming in some parts of the ocean. The bathroom walls are covered with tiles of different shades of blue, in random distribution, all the way till the ceiling. The ceiling is light blue, mimicking the sky.
Oh and maybe a yellow rubber duck in the bathtub. Yellow ducks are cool.
Somewhere in the basement of the house is my secret lab. Inside I'll have all sorts of weird things bubbling up awesomeness. Of course I'll ensure it's safe, with adequate fire extinguisher and stuff, so when something explodes it will not burn the entire house down. No, it's such a beautiful house, I won't allow that to happen. But yeah, I may store up some illegal chemicals and heavy metals...oh wait why I'm I posting it here. Silly me ignore this paragraph completely it exist only in my imagination. (But who knows maybe someday I'll be lucky enough...)
Anyway, back to other parts of the house. In my study room I'll have a very big waste paper bin, because I'm too lazy to empty the rubbish frequently. Like really big so I'll only have to clear it once every six months or sth. In my study room I want all the walls to be filled with books, books and more books! Muhahaha! It's like a mini library. I'll have a very big desk so I can put many things on it and none will be pushed down. Here the sound is very well insulated. Or maybe not, I can open my window and still hear the sound of nature. Maybe a twig grows into my room through a window and a bird build a nest on it and, I don't know. Oh and one of the books trigger a door hidden among the bookshelves to open, leading to...oh never mind.
Oh my I'm taking my fantasy too wild. But never mind, it's my dream, dreams can go beyond one's wildest imaginings.
So moving on, let's see we've talked about the living room, my bedroom, the bathroom, my study room, my secret... so what have we left with? Oh right the kitchen, I want the kitchen to look as bright and cheerful as possible. Every morning beams of light should shine in making everything look very happy. The curtains are orange and yellow, there are sunflowers on the table and all the cabinets should be yellow, orange or white, so the room looks like a playroom, but it's not. For the rest, I don't really know, cakes?
Oh and there are many glass jars containing delicious things or materials. I want the cookie jar to be extremely big and look cookie jar-ish. Because cookies are awesome.
What now? Hmm... okay let's move out of the house to the most important part...the garden. I must must have a garden and must must have a dog. It's a must, I don't care. (Btw I also must have the house to be two storeys or more so that I can slide down the handle of the staircase--sounds really fun but never got the chance to try it)
As I've mentioned, the garden must be enclosed by beautiful white fences. I don't really care what type of plants grow in my garden, I want nature to take its course. Maybe growing a few fruit trees, some bushes and the rest be lined with grass. I'll love it if some rabbits or squirrels can make my garden their home. And then like most people I'll put some gardening chairs in my garden, or maybe a coffee table so that I can drink tea in this wonderful setting. And to make my garden the secret garden I'm going to make the only entrance to it in a bookshelf. Nope not the one in my study room, that one links to my... this one
is in the living room, and you can just push one side of the shelf to get through, just like a revolving door.
I want my dog to be fluffy, medium to big size, looking friendly and bark at strangers but not for no reason. Sadly I've never gotten a chance to have a dog, but I swear that once I grow up I'm going to get a dog. Oh yeah and I created that garden partly so that my dog can fool around and play in it :)
I think I've really imagined too much, to the finest detail for some. Those who know me may be shocked by this. I'm always seen as someone logical, serious maybe (but really I'm not serious at all), but hey, as you see me thinking and being oblivious to the world you may think there's some important theories floating up in my mind, however in reality most of the time they are these kind of things. I've more than a gazillion times imagined how my future house will look like and came up with some amusing ideas. It feels good that I can share this. There are many many ways it can become and here is just one. It will take me forever to list all, and new ones will always pop into existence. (But do note that not all the time this happens...there are still times when important things come up in my head okay)
Why would you so randomly post this I hear you ask, well I happen to watch a night movie on channel 5, and as the ending music plays and I stayed curled up in my sofa I start to imagine myself curling up in the sofa near a fireplace, listening to the music. Then suddenly I felt very dreamy and happy, then I start to think of how my house could look like...and it begins.
Yeah I've always been like that, thinking of random things and then allowing it to bring me to random places. Now you know.
Sunday 13 October 2013
Who am I?
I do not understand myself. I don't know where I come from, where I'd go, or what I want. Perhaps the easiest question is the last one. I like theories, love reading books and getting exposure to new, exiting ideas. I value ideas more than fact. I love things that are beautiful, be it visually, musically, or theoretically. I cannot understand people's obsession with new bags and shoes (if they look normal and such--don't quite get fashion, how can something so normal or ugly be worth so much). I cannot understand idol-ism. I cannot understand why people will hold on to a belief so dearly even if they know it may be wrong.
I realised that I'm actually quite confused about how things work in the environment around me. Normally I'm not interested, but once I start to delve into how people think, why would they do this and that, I get headaches.
Here, I'm going to make a list of things I cannot understand:
I realised that I'm actually quite confused about how things work in the environment around me. Normally I'm not interested, but once I start to delve into how people think, why would they do this and that, I get headaches.
Here, I'm going to make a list of things I cannot understand:
- Politics
- Economy
- Fans--idol-ism
- Love for branded goods
- Meaningless chats about how stuff like manicure, shoes and stuff
- People eating insects
- Why mediacorp can't find good shows to put on its channels
- Why would people watch something they do not like to watch just to "kill time"
- Why would people choose to be ignorant when they are given the chance to be not to
The list is just a start. I think there are a lot more of things which I don't understand but I can't think of any in the present moment. I feel that the way each person perceive the world, his thinking, logic and feelings are very different from others. Just as mentioned by the vsauce video:
There are no ways to tell what is going through the mind of another person. There are no ways to tell a lot of things, such as whether the society's code of conduct is right, whether humans are meant to be connected biologically (ie there are some similarities between the thinking of two humans). Inside each of us, our perceptions of the outside world are only limited to us. We are very much alone.
I also understand that there will be some things we will never know, some things we will never make sense of because they aren't meant to make sense, and some things we will never understand.
Am I the only one being bugged by this uncertainty? I just find the thought that I'll never able to fully understand even myself be quite frightening.
Post EOY plans
Yay 11 Oct officially marks the end of EOY aka period of immense torture and pain. So here I am posting about my plans because I'm extremely bored I've been making this list since start of revision and some of the things are pretty awesome so I shall just post them here although nobody will be interested anyway.
- watch slamacow videos--actually I kind of watched all of them during revision
- Read the book on paradox--
borrowed it during revision and only managed to read halfway - Complete a quest in minecraft without cheating
- File all my things
- Clean my room
- Borrow Chemistry and Physics JC textbooks
- Update my blog about random things--yeah...like now
- Take an IQ test
- Go to online intellectual discussion forums
- Watch "Fringe"
- Learn piano
Okay as you can see the list is quite boring because during revision everything seems 10 times more interesting. However some in the list are essential, like file my things, clean my room and borrow/buy JC textbooks.
This is going to be a short and boring post. Bye.
Sunday 6 October 2013
stereotypes
Just as I'm mugging maths for tomorrow's paper, I've discovered some very interesting things. With the help of my awesome classmates I've managed to have a try on HCI's past year EOY papers which according to my classmates, are "very hard." Seeing the confession on HCI confession page that odd year papers are harder, I started on my epic quest go conquer the 2011 paper.
Turns out that it is not as hard as what I thought, although there are some questions I really have no idea how to solve, generally it is fine. However, I've heard that some classmates commented that the 2012 paper was hard, and I remembered their expression when they heard that the even year papers are supposed to be "easier". So I went to take a look at the 2012 paper. After I looked through the 2012 paper I felt a sense of familiarity. Wait...isn't that also the NY 2012 paper? In which the two schools set a combined paper?
What? I thought some of my classmates have commented that NY 2012 paper is quite easy. So now I have two opinions. Then I wondered, there couldn't be such a big difference. Could my classmate who commented that the 2012 paper was hard, simply felt it is hard because the paper is a HCI paper?
My speculation could be wrong, of course, maybe it is indeed due to the gap in my classmates' abilities. However, I'm sure that the fact that it is an HCI PAPER, do play a part. HCI paper is supposed to be difficult. They supposedly have a higher standard than us. If we can't do a HCI paper, it's okay because it is HCI. NY and HCI set a combined paper just to kill us Nanyangers etc etc.
Why do we always have to place ourselves in an inferior position? These guys at the other side are not older, nor smarter than us. Why do we always assume that HCI will have a higher standard, and going to HCJC is going to be intimidating because everyone there will be better than us and we will just have to work three times as hard just to keep up with the rest?
It seems that it is an universal truth that guys are better in maths and science than girls and girls are better in languages than guys. True, to a certain extent perhaps, since neuroscience researches do prove that brains of the two genders are wired somewhat differently. However, things get very irritating when these assumptions are being applied to every single girl and every single guy. People are different, no matter what the trend is, there will be a group of minorities that go against the general trend. Who says women cannot do science and men cannot nurse children? We know these people exist, but they will be viewed by the world differently. He is a renown physicist, vs she is a renown physicist. When people hear the former, they are going to think he must be really smart, hope that he can make scientific breakthrough some day and benefit mankind. When people hear the latter, they are going to think Woah, she must be really really smart, and is she married? How is she going to get a husband? Yes, stereotypes. And these stereotypes are very very irritating, and they cause troubles as well.
Imagine a man and a woman apply to a job vacancy, for just a normal office job. Studies show that if two people with the same ability apply for the job, the man has a higher chance of getting it. Why? Because somewhere deep rooted in people's brain, women are not supposed to work. Most people don't realise it, but we all feel it sometimes. People feel that women seem to be unable to focus in her work and stay serious like a man. You can picture a man deep in thoughts, his finger gliding across the keyboard typing a long and wordy document and he was frowning so hard and so concentrated in work that when his assistance carries him a cup of coffee he didn't notice. Now, change the man to a woman. Does the picture still comes very naturally? No, right.
And this stereotype gets more obvious when the job seems to be "for a man", like engineer, mathematician, scientist, programmer, etc. Can you imagine a female programmer crouching day and night in front of her computer while being completely oblivious to the surrounding? You can't. In fact, women are unlikely to do this too, because obviously they have some good qualities such as sense of responsibility that some men lack. Oops, I'm getting into stereotypes again.
Turns out that it is not as hard as what I thought, although there are some questions I really have no idea how to solve, generally it is fine. However, I've heard that some classmates commented that the 2012 paper was hard, and I remembered their expression when they heard that the even year papers are supposed to be "easier". So I went to take a look at the 2012 paper. After I looked through the 2012 paper I felt a sense of familiarity. Wait...isn't that also the NY 2012 paper? In which the two schools set a combined paper?
What? I thought some of my classmates have commented that NY 2012 paper is quite easy. So now I have two opinions. Then I wondered, there couldn't be such a big difference. Could my classmate who commented that the 2012 paper was hard, simply felt it is hard because the paper is a HCI paper?
My speculation could be wrong, of course, maybe it is indeed due to the gap in my classmates' abilities. However, I'm sure that the fact that it is an HCI PAPER, do play a part. HCI paper is supposed to be difficult. They supposedly have a higher standard than us. If we can't do a HCI paper, it's okay because it is HCI. NY and HCI set a combined paper just to kill us Nanyangers etc etc.
Why do we always have to place ourselves in an inferior position? These guys at the other side are not older, nor smarter than us. Why do we always assume that HCI will have a higher standard, and going to HCJC is going to be intimidating because everyone there will be better than us and we will just have to work three times as hard just to keep up with the rest?
It seems that it is an universal truth that guys are better in maths and science than girls and girls are better in languages than guys. True, to a certain extent perhaps, since neuroscience researches do prove that brains of the two genders are wired somewhat differently. However, things get very irritating when these assumptions are being applied to every single girl and every single guy. People are different, no matter what the trend is, there will be a group of minorities that go against the general trend. Who says women cannot do science and men cannot nurse children? We know these people exist, but they will be viewed by the world differently. He is a renown physicist, vs she is a renown physicist. When people hear the former, they are going to think he must be really smart, hope that he can make scientific breakthrough some day and benefit mankind. When people hear the latter, they are going to think Woah, she must be really really smart, and is she married? How is she going to get a husband? Yes, stereotypes. And these stereotypes are very very irritating, and they cause troubles as well.
Imagine a man and a woman apply to a job vacancy, for just a normal office job. Studies show that if two people with the same ability apply for the job, the man has a higher chance of getting it. Why? Because somewhere deep rooted in people's brain, women are not supposed to work. Most people don't realise it, but we all feel it sometimes. People feel that women seem to be unable to focus in her work and stay serious like a man. You can picture a man deep in thoughts, his finger gliding across the keyboard typing a long and wordy document and he was frowning so hard and so concentrated in work that when his assistance carries him a cup of coffee he didn't notice. Now, change the man to a woman. Does the picture still comes very naturally? No, right.
And this stereotype gets more obvious when the job seems to be "for a man", like engineer, mathematician, scientist, programmer, etc. Can you imagine a female programmer crouching day and night in front of her computer while being completely oblivious to the surrounding? You can't. In fact, women are unlikely to do this too, because obviously they have some good qualities such as sense of responsibility that some men lack. Oops, I'm getting into stereotypes again.
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